Negative People

On your health and fitness journey you are going to encounter many obstacles. BRINGIN IT everyday is hard. Eating super clean is super hard. But there is another type of obstacle that can have a greater effect than you might like to admit, and that is negative people. You might have already discovered this obstacle on your journey, and you will notice that it will be one of the most frustrating. The “naysayers” I call them – people who resist the changes that you are trying to make in your life. These people come from every angle and every walk of life: co-workers, friends, family, casual acquaintances, and even facebook friends (do they count? lol). You might see the negative nancys throw these comments at you:

“Cmon! One CHEAT meal isnt going to hurt.”

“Working out for an hour a day is impossible, you cant keep that up.”

“You mean you NEVER skip a workout, nah that wont last.”

“Dude its birthday cake! Dont be a buzz kill!”

“You look too skinny.” (my personal favorite)

“You look like you are sick and Im worried about you.”

“Everything in moderation!”

“You are obsessed with working out.”

“This is just a phase and it will pass just like all the other stuff you quit.”

Working out for an hour a day just isnt practical, nobody has time for that type of commitment.” (coming from someone who watches 2-3 hours of TV per night)

“We can never go out to eat because you cant eat anything!”

“Why do you have to be so extreme about this???”

Have you heard any of these yet? I have heard all of them, and mostly from the people closest to me! Its frusterating at time because beleive me, I would love to pig out with my co-workers on pizza and hawaiian grill, but I bring my chicken, veggies, cheese stick and fruit. And yes I get laughed at quite a bit and am the focus of the discussion for most of the lunch, but I wouldnt change a thing!

And what the heck is it with the “You are too skinny” comments??? I weight 183 pounds!!! Since when is 183 pounds skinny? These people are just used to seeing the fat me for the last 11 years and arent use to the new me. When people see me online they dont say “you are too skinny”. They say “you’re RIPPED!” They were so used to seeing me fat that it made them comfortable with their own self, but now that I am super fit, they have a problem with it.

The real issue is not that they are genuinely worried about me. The real issue is that I made a change and they now feel threatened because they are now more sensitive about their own health/fitness/weight issues. But rather than lifting you up and congratulating you, a majority of people will want to bring you back down to their level so they dont feel bad about themselves. This is much easier for them to do that to actually make a change in their life.

Be ready for it gang!  It’s the hardest part of making a lifestyle change.  The resistance you’ll face can knock you off track if you aren’t prepared to meet it head on.  I’ve learned how to respond to each of the above statements, and you’ll need to also!  If naysayers are bringing you down, check in here, e-mail me, or read some success stories from our RIPPED RESULTS.  Focus on the positive.  Keep your eyes on the prize.  Don’t listen to naysayers.  Their negative attitude is their problem, not yours!

If you have never read the book “The Magic of Thinking Big” by David Schwartz, then I highly recommend you do. Here is what he has to say about negative people:

“It’s hard to deny it. Our environment shapes us, and makes us think the way we do. For example, prolonged exposure and association to negative people makes us in turn think negatively. Associating ourselves with people who think big will raise our level of thinking. Our success is largely dependent upon what and who we choose to surround ourselves with.

So when choosing friends, select those who are interested in positive things; friends who really want to see you succeed and willingly encourage you in your plans and ideals. Find those who have common goals and desires, having a support system makes all the difference when your own motivation is in the slumps.”

That support system is ME, coach Todd, its RIPPEDCLUB, its the people goin through the same thing you are going through! Dont let people who bring you down have the privelege of your attention (maybe thats unreasonable, lol). You can listen to their comments and respond politely, but give no weight to their negative opinions or comments! The more you are around these types of people, the more difficult your journey will be.

It is said that you will be like the 5 people you are around the most, whether that is income, attitudes, or emotions. You will reflect the characteristics of these people. So choose them wisely. Choose people who build you up and encourage and celebrate victories with you! Thats why I love RIPPEDCLUB. You will never see a negative comment from a member of RIPPEDCLUB. I am sure someday I might have to deal with someone like that, but it hasnt happened yet. Everyone on our team is so eager to help and celebrate with one another. Thats why getting plugged into our exclusive facebook page is so critical to success; you are surrounded by people who love what they are doing and love that you want to make a change also! Its a win-win!

In addition to plugging in, something I would advise you all to do is to write down your goals, including the “WHY“.  Why did you decide to start P90X or Insanity?  What things do you want to change about your body / mind / attitude / energy level / habits during this journey?  When others bring you down, look at your “WHY“.  You started this journey not out of convenience or because you thought it would be easy.  You had reasons … GOOD REASONS!  Your “WHY” statements will outweigh any negativity you hear from others.

My “WHY” is to set an example for my family to follow and to take care of the body that God has blessed me with so that I can use it to the fullest for His purposes! THIS is much more important to me than sinking back into a rut because someone said “you’re too skinny”…My solution: Keep BRINGIN IT!!!

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4 comments
livng2tell
livng2tell

Okay.  It is easy for me to block out negative comments other people make; however, I am guilty of telling myself some of these, particularly when it comes to the eating.  I consider myself a "cheat meal" guy.  I have a hard time with depriving myself of something I crave, because if I don't, I may end up binging and feeling angry and resentment, which may affect my focus and dedication to the program.  Having a "cheat meal" doesn't mean that I don't take the program seriously, but I have to be realistic.  At the same time, I should come to expect that I won't get the results that I desire.  It is a struggle, but I don't think it dictates my commitment to wanting to do better; it is a process for me and it will take time.

Bentley
Bentley

THANKS GUYS!!! NEEDED THAT. SOMETIMES ITS HARD TO STAY MOTIVATED. BUT EVERYTHING ABOVE IS SOOOO TRUE. MY PERSONAL FAVORITE IS "NOBODY CARES!!!". AND RECENTLY, "DOESN'T MATTER". I SHALL TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. :)

Jon Nicholson
Jon Nicholson

Great article, Todd. People define themselves in the world by the arhitecture of the people around them. When we change individually, we cause ripples in other people's world and their understanding of your place and theirs. This makes them uncomfortable. A lot of the negativity comes from that. You're re-defining yourself and indirectly them. Just be positive and understanding that their negativity is fear and uncertainly. The more consistent you are, the quicker they will redefine you in their mind and get used to the new you.

Coach Todd
Coach Todd

great point Jon! hopefully our ripples can reach more and more people for their own good :)